To Tampa and then down the Florida Keys.
Miranda invited us to go with Brad and her to the Florida Keys. They were going to her brother’s wedding and we hadn’t visited Deb’s mom in Tampa in a long time. She had two scares where we thought we were going to lose her this last year. She’s doing so much better, we thought it would be a great time to see her and then go to the Keys.
Tampa
When we arrived in Tampa we had to wait for our rental car. The Dollar ad said they were open 24 hours. It wasn’t true. The Hertz counter which also rents out Dollar cars, after hours, was open. Everyone on the plane, it seemed, needed a car that day. Our plane had been late by an hour, and now there was a two-hour line to get a car. We finally got our car and headed out into the darkness. Just as we left the airport, the clouds opened up with a deluge. It’s not rain like we had in Washington where you would have to use the lowest setting of your intermittent wiper to swipe off the droplets. This was like the opening of a faucet. The wipers couldn’t keep up with it and they were going as fast as they could. I could no longer see the lines on the road due to the water rushing past and the lightning blinding me momentarily. Oh, well, I’m going to wreck another rental car. I should have bought the insurance. Meanwhile, Deb’s looking for a hotel to stop at. As we neared the condo, the rain finally slowed. In fact, we had a hard time convincing Deb’s mom that it had rained.
We had a great time at Rose’s condo. There’s a pool and it’s a good central location to a lot of fun things to do. We went swimming almost every night when the sun began to go down in the sky and would stay there until the no-see-em’s would come out. It was the first time I heard that name as far as I can remember. They left me alone but found Deb a tasty treat. Tiny little biting bugs that come out at dusk. They are so small you can’t tell they are there, until they get you, that is.
We made our way to Phillipe Park. Mr. Phillipe was credited with bringing grapefruit to Florida and the park is what is left of his plantation. They buried Phillipe in the park, but then forgot to record the exact location. I could have walked over his remains without knowing it.
There were all sorts of activities in the park. There must have been a prom coming up because a photographer was taking pictures of a girl in a pretty dress right in the middle of the trail. We had to sneak around her to get by.
The park also had an Tocobaga Indian mound. The mound is roughly two thirds of its original size. The mound would be where the chief lived and where their temple would be located. The Tocobaga Indians are now extinct. They succumbed to the violence and diseases the Europeans brought over when they came to the new world.
A snake crossed our path too. I don’t know what kind. There was also a turtle. As we sat down to eat our lunch, a gang of delinquent squirrels surrounded us. They would slowly move towards our food and sneak under our table until we shooed them away. They didn’t go very far before they doubled back and were underfoot again. Deb threw a potato chip to try to get them to go over to it and away from us.
“Don’t feed them,” I said. “You don’t pay extortionists.” She kept doing it though. I don’t know why. Only one of the criminals would go get the chips and the rest were left to press us for more and more food. We retreated to the car, carrying our leftovers with us.
A funny thing happened while I was taking pictures of the park. A voice said, “Why are you calling us?” Somehow, I had dialed two of my ex-work buddies. I hadn’t intended to do that, but as long as I had them on the line, I bragged about vacationing in Florida. I didn’t see wasting an opportunity.
The next day we had hung around the condo long enough and it
was too soon to go swimming, so I suggested we go to John Chestnut Sr Park.
Deb’s mom had never been there before so it was worth exploring, I figured.
We arrived there and a sign said this way to the observation tower. I love observation towers so I followed the trail. Deb and her mother opted out of climbing up any tower because it was hot and humid. I followed the sign and all that I found was a boat ramp. A guy had just launched his boat and complained the ramp was almost too small for his needs. There were at least ten people in that boat so I could see what he meant. I asked a woman sitting there where the tower was. I don’t know why we think lounging women and gas station attendants know where everything in town is, but we do and she did. She pointed to a wood-planked trail down the far side of the boat launch, so I followed it.
There at the end was the tower. Four stories later, I stood on top of the thing. The view was great. I could see all of Tarpon Lake from there. A couple of jet skiers floated by on the way to the ramp. The breeze was the best part. It was hot that day and being above the trees, there was nothing stopping the gentle wind.
I finally climbed down. On the way back to the car, I passed a whole group of people barbequing. It smelled so good, I almost invited myself over. We drove around the park before heading back to the condo.
We drove out to Honeymoon Island in the afternoon. It’s a small strip of land just off the coast and you can get there by a causeway. During a hurricane a long time ago, a channel was formed between what is now the island and the mainland. Some of the beaches were closed as was the gift shop / café. We sat out on the balcony of the café and watched the waves roll in. To me the beach was rocky and unlike Clearwater Beach which is in the top five beaches of America. Being so close, Deb and I headed over to Clearwater Beach early before the crowds arrived. We didn’t swim, but were up past our ankles. We enjoyed the morning, but rushed back so her mother wouldn’t feel alone.
We ate at a wonderful Greek restaurant in Tarpon Springs for dinner. Tarpon Springs is where the sponge boats leave out of. There is a sponge museum there. We didn’t go this time, but a few years ago we did. I now know more about sponges than I ever wanted to know.
Key Largo
Our last day in Tampa, we got up early and said goodbye to Deb’s mom, then went and turned in the rental car and caught our flight to Miami. It costs thirty dollars a bag to check luggage, but it only cost $47 a person to fly first class, with a free checked bag. Okay, it was silly on such a short flight, but I did it. Finally, I had some leg room. It was the same amount of legroom that I had as a kid when the airlines were regulated. Those days, they fed you good and would give the kids a pair of wings and you could ask for playing cards to pass the time. You can ask for them now, but the answer is no.
I noticed when people entered the plane, they sneered at me like they were saying, “And who are you up here in first class?” Then I realized that I probably did the same thing when I walked past the people in first class on my way back to the cheap seats. I loved the extra leg and seat room. It didn’t matter to Deb though as she has shorter legs. She’s like, “What’s the point?”
Brad and Miranda beat us to Miami by about an hour, so they had the rental car almost rented by the time we had our bags from baggage claim and were waiting for them in front of the airport.
To my surprise, Miranda said they had rented a Land Rover Discovery. It’s a large beast of a vehicle, that nearly requires a running start to climb into it. Even at that, Deb and I had to put one of the smaller suitcases between us as the back was full.
“Clark, choose somewhere to eat,” I heard Brad say on the way down. All I had were the names of the restaurants as we drove along Highway One.
Giving my best guess, I chose one right on the highway. It looked pretty desperate on the outside, but had plenty of cars around it. We ventured inside, and I do mean ventured. We were the only non-Spanish speakers in there. We stayed and had a good meal. Lucky guess.
The guy renting us the condo called Miranda every twenty minutes and then texted in the middle. We arrived at the place a little late, but okay. He took us around to show us the amenities. Old bikes, worn out kayaks were some of them. The water stank as some smelly sargasso seaweed had drifted ashore and rotted. There was a nice lagoon which had no seaweed in the middle of the complex. It had no alligators or sharks either, he claimed. As he’s taking us around the temperature is ninety-five with even higher humidity. I’m melting by this point. But he keeps walking and talking and cracking dirty jokes the whole time. They weren’t even funny dirty jokes. I take that back; they were to him. He was getting a real kick out of his own alleged wit.
When we finally broke free, we headed upstairs and turned down the temperature. There is only one key to the condo and the elevator. You can go down without the elevator key. You just can’t go back up without it. Nor can you take the stairs because they are keyed too. So, we had to coordinate our movements so as not to lock anyone out.
We explored the area at first, then decided on where to eat for dinner. That night we tried to make our way to the end of the jetty where there were some Adirondack chairs set up, but it looked like a party out there and also the mosquitos were out in force, so we headed back to the condo.
The north side of the island is the nicer side as it has the beaches. The south side is a maze of mangrove trees and canals. The top five things to do on the island are all underwater. I don’t see us doing a whole lot of that.
The next morning, I found a tennis ball on our balcony. Since we are four stories up, that had to have been a really bad shot. I tossed it back down trying to hit the bucket of balls but missed by a long ways
.
We ate at the Waffle House restaurant. The fun part was that I had included this restaurant in one of my books. It wasn’t as quaint as I had described it in the book. It was still okay, but just.
We took a glass bottomed boat out to Molasses Reef that afternoon. The boats leave from John Pennecamp Coral Reef State Park, so you have to pay park admission on top of the cost of the boat. We wandered around while we waited. There were kayakers and paddle boarders making their way out of the mangrove canals. Every once in a while, a fast boat causing a big wake flew by.
There is a beach with two 17th century cannons on it from a ship wreck. They were huge.
When we lined up for the glass bottom boat, a lady with a microphone directed the people. She had on skin-colored, yoga pants and a t-shirt. Really, you wore that to work? I thought. Then another woman came out in the exact same outfit. Really, they made you wear that to work?
Molasses Reef is in the middle of the reef system off the Keys and is the fifth largest coral reef on the planet. Molasses reef was named after the boat full of molasses that ran aground on it. Our boat seemed to almost scrape bottom while we were in the mangrove channel. There was sea grass on either side of us after that. The reef is fifteen miles off shore and when we arrived there, the boat slowed.
We saw all sorts of fish and other sea creatures. One girl had a microphone and shouted out the different species of fish we passed over. I saw a nurse shark. You could hear the parrot fish crunching on the coral reef. Those fish were the ones to thank for the nice sand beaches in the area, we were told. There were a whole bunch of other fish I don’t remember the names of. One that stuck with me though was the yellow tail snapper. It’s a beautiful silver fish with yellow highlights on its tail and a stripe down the side.
We swam in the pool when we arrived home. Afterwards, we asked the people around us where to eat. A couple of them suggested Snook’s Bayside Restaurant. We walked up to the host stand. It looked like a little fancier place than we thought. We asked the guy if we needed reservations, he said we did and that they were fully booked up, but he could fit us in. I thought he was giving us a line, because they weren’t full the whole time we were there.
The restaurant sat right on the beach and had a dock running out from there. There were two “Tikis,” basically floating bars, that looked ready to go out. We walked out on the dock and then came back to order. To my surprise, the three of them ordered yellowtail snapper for dinner. How could you! After watching those beautiful fish swim free in the ocean, you come back and eat their cousins! I held my tongue though. I ordered crab cakes myself. Not even a distant crab cousin likes the way their relative looks.
That night it began to sprinkle. We thought about going to the end of the jetty but Miranda took one look around the corner, saw a wall of rain water coming towards us, she turned and yelled, “Run.”
We made it into the building just in time before the monsoon hit. That evening we opened up all the blinds and turned out the lights so we could watch the thunder and lightning storm as it passed by us. Afterwards we played games.
The next morning, we got up and went to Keys Bite for breakfast. It was so good and they had outdoor dining, which was great.
We then watched the original Africa Queen come into dock. Someone bought it and brought it to Florida. I debated about taking a ride on it, but there was no place to get out of the sun and it cost too much. I did get some nice pictures though.
We swam and kayaked in the lagoon in the complex. Watched the fish swim in and out. I was less than successful at kayaking, so I got out, tripped over a rock in the water and then scraped against that same rock as I fell. It gave me a deep scratch on the leg. Even though it was a hot day, I couldn’t go swimming in the pool until it stopped bleeding.
We drove around and explored the island a little bit. Tried to find a park that showed on the map but found a fenced-in jungle instead. I’m wondering if it’s one of the parks that you can only explore by water. Today we finally made it to the end of the jetty. Had a nice talk as we watched the sunset. Okay it was cloudy but we could imagine where the sun was going to set through the clouds.
Key West
Last day in Key Largo. We ate at Keys Bite again and then packed our bags and headed down the road. On the way we saw this enormous lobster, two and a half stories high. Photo op! We all climbed out and took photos in front of it and did some shopping too. We had time to kill because we couldn’t check into the next Airbnb until the afternoon.
There a million restaurants on Marathon Key so choosing one was hard. We would find one on our google maps and by the time we checked the reviews and prices, we would be past it. We finally decided on Barracuda Grill. With a name like that, it had to be good. Besides, it was right on the highway, which made it convenient.
The food was good and the server had us draw pictures of barracudas on the paper table cloth. She liked mine the best, I think. She gave me two thumbs up, but the others only got a one thumb up. That means something, right?
I finally got to go across the Seven Mile Bridge. It was a bucket list item of mine. I know it’s silly, but I really wanted to do it. I enjoyed the drive down the Keys too. I got to see all the places of heard about but had never seen.
We drove into Key West right when it was time to check into the Airbnb. This one would allow us to come and go as we please, because it was a keypad entry and no key was required to get into the elevator.
They had a pool at this place too so we went down to take advantage of it. You know when you have those people who go down to the pool and play their music? We ran into a group who did that, only we loved the music so we were rocking out with them. One of the girls jumped out of the pool. She had on panties and a top only. I think she wasn’t planning on going swimming that day but her friends talked her into it. She fled to a beach chair and pulled on her shorts when we arrived. She’d have been fine if she had stayed in the water. We didn’t stay all that long.
We spent the next day exploring downtown Key West. Parking was a problem. We decided to eat breakfast at the Southernmost Beach Café. The place is indoors, but open to nature as it has no glass in the windows. A fresh breeze was enjoyable though. During breakfast a bird tried to land on my waterglass. I shooed him away but knocked over my glass and the water went onto Miranda. The waiter came over all excited. “That’s the bird I’ve been chasing. It has fishing line wrapped around its foot.” He then went after the bird with a box. He didn’t catch it. We cleaned the water up as best as we could and finished our breakfast. When they cleared the dishes, some more of my water had pooled under Miranda’s plate and it drained onto Miranda’s lap when they took her dish away. So, I apologized again.
We walked around the town until we were too hot and then found a store with air conditioning to cool off in. One of the places we visited is Truman’s winter white house. It’s right off the navy base. There was the main building which is now a museum and then the support buildings all around. We only visited the gift shop.
The next day we found an Ihop which had no birds flying through it. We rushed down to get our picture by the Southernmost point of the United States. There was no line that early in the morning. Usually there is a line a block long. My map shows that it’s not actually the southernmost point of the continental United States. It’s not even the Southernmost point of Key West. The Truman Annex is 900 feet further south than the marker, but since it’s on Navy land and is not open to visitors, the marker stays where it is. There is also a private island, Ballast Key, that is even further south than that. That didn’t matter that morning, we still did the photo op.
On Sunday we attended church. There were forty people there. Church started when there were only twenty-nine, the rest came during church. One of the men there said it would happen that way. He called it “Island time.” That number included nine tourists.
Deb asked the man what we shouldn’t miss while we were there. He suggested Mel Fisher’s Treasure Museum. We went over and visited the museum. It was worth it. One last swim and we went to bed as we had an early flight out the next morning.
When we arrived at the airport, it was closed. The door said it opened at 4am. Our taxi driver went and asked the security guy what time they opened. When she came back, she had some choice words about the guy. Apparently, they had met before and were on bad terms. He said they open at five. She said the door says four. He said he was in charge and they open at five.
She offered to drive us back to the condo for free. Of course, the trip back to the airport wouldn’t be free and she charged us seven dollars each for the ride. I should have questioned her on it because I have never had to pay per person for a taxi ride.
Meanwhile the security guard wandered over, restating that they open at five. He suggested we wait there because by the time we made the trip back to the condo it would be time to turn around and come back again.
It was a nice night so we opted to stay. The security guard waited until she was gone and then opened the airport doors and let us in. “I’m not going to let no taxi driver tell me how to do my job.”
Our flight out went smooth. Even though it’s a small island, it’s served by several major airlines. We met all of our connections and were landing around noon. Funny thing about the Spokane Airport is they have a free carwash for those who park there and the parking is inexpensive compared to Seattle. So, we washed the car and then headed home.
Brad and Miranda didn’t have the luck we had. They had a flight to Chicago and there was a tropical storm between Key West and Chicago. There plane was delayed by four hours. Their original flight had them getting back at midnight into Seattle. Then there’s another hour and a half drive after that. I’m sure it was near sun up before they arrived at their house.
Panama Canal During Corona Virus
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